As lightening flashes across a tormented sky, I cackle with glee and invite you, my dear friends, into my laboratory, where we will all witness my latest experiment: an embedded video!
IT'S ALIVE!! IT'S ALIVE!!!
Monday, March 24, 2014
Saturday, March 15, 2014
Beauty, Truth, and Incoherent Commentary - Verse 03
Let's keep picking on Mr. Milton, shall we? After all, although I never met the man, based on his reputation he could "lighten up" a little.
What poem should we peruse today? How about this one:
On His Deceased Wife by John Milton
METHOUGHT I saw my late espoused Saint
Brought to me like Alcestis from the grave,
Whom Joves great Son to her glad Husband gave,
Rescu'd from death by force though pale and faint.
Mine as whom washt from spot of child-bed taint,
Purification in the old Law did save,
And such, as yet once more I trust to have
Full sight of her in Heaven without restraint,
Came vested all in white, pure as her mind:
Her face was vail'd, yet to my fancied sight,
Love, sweetness, goodness, in her person shin'd
So clear, as in no face with more delight.
But O as to embrace me she enclin'd
I wak'd, she fled, and day brought back my night.
Okay .... if you read this poem through, then I hope you have a new appreciation for Mr. Milton. What a beautiful, heart-wrenching dedication to a lost lover! John, you old Puritan, I didn't know you had it in you.
What poem should we peruse today? How about this one:
On His Deceased Wife by John Milton
METHOUGHT I saw my late espoused Saint
Brought to me like Alcestis from the grave,
Whom Joves great Son to her glad Husband gave,
Rescu'd from death by force though pale and faint.
Mine as whom washt from spot of child-bed taint,
Purification in the old Law did save,
And such, as yet once more I trust to have
Full sight of her in Heaven without restraint,
Came vested all in white, pure as her mind:
Her face was vail'd, yet to my fancied sight,
Love, sweetness, goodness, in her person shin'd
So clear, as in no face with more delight.
But O as to embrace me she enclin'd
I wak'd, she fled, and day brought back my night.
Okay .... if you read this poem through, then I hope you have a new appreciation for Mr. Milton. What a beautiful, heart-wrenching dedication to a lost lover! John, you old Puritan, I didn't know you had it in you.
Sunday, March 9, 2014
Beauty, Truth, and Incoherent Commentary - Verse 02
I've already begun insulting the memory of John Milton, so I may as well continue. I'll copy here the few sonnets of his I understand, as Latin is a mystery to me. (It may as well be Greek!)
On His Being Arrived to the Age of Twenty-three by John Milton
How soon hath Time, the subtle thief of youth,
Stolen on his wing my three and twentieth year!
My hasting days fly on with full career,
But my late spring no bud or blossom shew'th.
Perhaps my semblance might deceive the truth,
That I to manhood am arrived so near,
And inward ripeness doth much less appear,
That some more timely-happy spirits indu'th.
Yet be it less or more, or soon or slow,
It shall be still in strictest measure even
To that same lot, however mean or high,
Toward which Time leads me, and the will of Heaven.
All is, if I have grace to use it so,
As ever in my great Task-master's eye.
Whining about being 24 years old? Good Lord, man! What until you're my age, and every body part hurts and malfunctions, you fart dust, your eyes, ears, nose, and tongue can't sense much of anything any more, and to walk up a flight of stairs requires all your energy!
Oh to be back in my 40's again!
On His Being Arrived to the Age of Twenty-three by John Milton
Sunday, February 9, 2014
The "Egg-Laying" Articles are FINALLY Done!
We've FINALLY finished writing all the articles in the "Breeding Egg-Laying Aquarium Fish" series. Hooray!
This was started back in November, and it took a late night last night to wrap it all up. But now they're ready for your perusal.
Without further ado, here are the links to all six articles on breeding egg-laying aquarium fish:
This was started back in November, and it took a late night last night to wrap it all up. But now they're ready for your perusal.
Without further ado, here are the links to all six articles on breeding egg-laying aquarium fish:
Pleasant reading!
03/15/2014 - With a tear in my eye, and deep sadness in my heart, I have removed these articles from Expertpages. With the turmoil that is going on with Crazy Texan's websites at the moment, EP seems to be the forgotten stepchild, as the site doesn't even have ads at the moment. When an editor advised us not to post new articles there anymore, I had enough. I will repost these articles to InfoBarrel, (if they accept them), or FullofKnowledge, once Google wakes up and stops indexing them to EP.
Sunday, January 26, 2014
Beauty, Truth, and Incoherent Commentary: Verse 1
For Verse 1, what better to do than swipe a sonnet from a really good poet?
On His Blindness, by John Milton
When I consider how my light is spent
Ere half my days in this dark world and wide,
And that one talent which is death to hide
Lodg'd with me useless, though my soul more bent
To serve therewith my Maker, and present
My true account, lest he returning chide,
"Doth God exact day-labour, light denied?"
I fondly ask. But Patience, to prevent
That murmur, soon replies: "God doth not need
Either man's work or his own gifts: who best
Bear his mild yoke, they serve him best. His state
Is kingly; thousands at his bidding speed
And post o'er land and ocean without rest:
They also serve who only stand and wait."
So the moral of the story is when you drink yourself blind, don't feel guilty about laying about doing nothing the next day?
On His Blindness, by John Milton
When I consider how my light is spent
Ere half my days in this dark world and wide,
And that one talent which is death to hide
Lodg'd with me useless, though my soul more bent
To serve therewith my Maker, and present
My true account, lest he returning chide,
"Doth God exact day-labour, light denied?"
I fondly ask. But Patience, to prevent
That murmur, soon replies: "God doth not need
Either man's work or his own gifts: who best
Bear his mild yoke, they serve him best. His state
Is kingly; thousands at his bidding speed
And post o'er land and ocean without rest:
They also serve who only stand and wait."
So the moral of the story is when you drink yourself blind, don't feel guilty about laying about doing nothing the next day?
Sunday, January 12, 2014
Ignatius, Ignatius! We miss you Ignatius!
Never heard of Ignatius P. Dufreis? Nicknamed Puffus, I believe he was made to "disappear" from history.
Granted, he did not lead the most disciplined of lifestyles. But then, I don't know: why did the author of that testimony suffer such distress and eventually commit suicide?
But this world is full of thieves and liars. We don't deserve you, Ignatius.
Granted, he did not lead the most disciplined of lifestyles. But then, I don't know: why did the author of that testimony suffer such distress and eventually commit suicide?
But this world is full of thieves and liars. We don't deserve you, Ignatius.
Sunday, December 29, 2013
Extrapolation on a Dream
So it all started out at Old Mike's place. It was kinda a dump - redneck paradise, if you know what I mean - but there were a lot of cute girls hanging around outside, so I figured what the heck, I'll give it a shot. We wandered around outside for a bit, checking out bits of this and pieces of that, (what a mess!), then headed inside. We wandered through one trailer, then went out into a courtyard type arrangement. Trailers were all around us, and Old Mike had improvised some sort of roof. (A tarp maybe?)
Well everyone had raved about what a great time they had at Mike's, but this looked like the pits to me. There was just a bunch of old furniture situated around a tiny TV set, all of which sat on a dirty old rug. Hardly anyone was there. Some old guy I didn't know told me that the best seat was on the sofa, so I sat myself down there, and tried to watch TV.
It was boring. Boring and uncomfortable, because I had to strain to even make out what was on the TV set. So when Keith came over, I was less on guard than normal.
Keith is ... well, Keith is a slimy jerk. Used car salesman in training, if you know what I mean. He's one of those guys who will slide up to you, all buddy-buddy like, and then scat, leaving you holding the bag, or talk you into doing some dangerous, unethical thing for which he will later deny all knowledge.
Keith was dressed in full disco-boy regalia. He told me they were all going to a club called "No-Nos", and invited us to come along. I wasn't too thrilled with the idea, as I HATE nightclubs, but it was better than sitting bored in Old Mike's pseudo-living room.
I didn't even know where No-Nos was located. Keith said it was just off Riverside, towards town, just past the intersection with Six Forks. Expecting the worse, my wife and I said goodbye to Old Mike, went outside, got in our car and drove off,
No-Nos was every bit as horrid as I expected. It was kinda like Taboo, in Columbia, SC, only louder, darker, and more creepy. We didn't stay very long! I later learned that there are "private rooms" for couples in the back, where, (for lack of a better word), penetrations of all varieties take place. The only rule is that each room can accommodate only two people, (Gender is irrelevant, I suppose.) The idea is that, after "dancing" with someone, (if you can call close quarters rubbing dancing!), you are both sufficiently hot-and-bothered to head off into a private space together, current significant other be damned!
I can envision three possible scenarios to a No-Nos visit. (Modify gender as appropriate to match your situation.)
1. Your lady dances, is invited to a private room, gets disgusted, and leaves.
2. Your lady dances, is invited to a private room, participates briefly, realizes she is out-of-line, then gets out of there in a hurry!
3. Your lady dances, is invited to a private room, participates, and has a great time, thinking about you only later, when she needs a ride home.
Well everyone had raved about what a great time they had at Mike's, but this looked like the pits to me. There was just a bunch of old furniture situated around a tiny TV set, all of which sat on a dirty old rug. Hardly anyone was there. Some old guy I didn't know told me that the best seat was on the sofa, so I sat myself down there, and tried to watch TV.
It was boring. Boring and uncomfortable, because I had to strain to even make out what was on the TV set. So when Keith came over, I was less on guard than normal.
Keith is ... well, Keith is a slimy jerk. Used car salesman in training, if you know what I mean. He's one of those guys who will slide up to you, all buddy-buddy like, and then scat, leaving you holding the bag, or talk you into doing some dangerous, unethical thing for which he will later deny all knowledge.
Keith was dressed in full disco-boy regalia. He told me they were all going to a club called "No-Nos", and invited us to come along. I wasn't too thrilled with the idea, as I HATE nightclubs, but it was better than sitting bored in Old Mike's pseudo-living room.
I didn't even know where No-Nos was located. Keith said it was just off Riverside, towards town, just past the intersection with Six Forks. Expecting the worse, my wife and I said goodbye to Old Mike, went outside, got in our car and drove off,
No-Nos was every bit as horrid as I expected. It was kinda like Taboo, in Columbia, SC, only louder, darker, and more creepy. We didn't stay very long! I later learned that there are "private rooms" for couples in the back, where, (for lack of a better word), penetrations of all varieties take place. The only rule is that each room can accommodate only two people, (Gender is irrelevant, I suppose.) The idea is that, after "dancing" with someone, (if you can call close quarters rubbing dancing!), you are both sufficiently hot-and-bothered to head off into a private space together, current significant other be damned!
I can envision three possible scenarios to a No-Nos visit. (Modify gender as appropriate to match your situation.)
1. Your lady dances, is invited to a private room, gets disgusted, and leaves.
2. Your lady dances, is invited to a private room, participates briefly, realizes she is out-of-line, then gets out of there in a hurry!
3. Your lady dances, is invited to a private room, participates, and has a great time, thinking about you only later, when she needs a ride home.
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