Sunday, December 29, 2013

Extrapolation on a Dream

So it all started out at Old Mike's place.  It was kinda a dump  -  redneck paradise, if you know what I mean  -  but there were a lot of cute girls hanging around outside, so I figured what the heck, I'll give it a shot.  We wandered around outside for a bit, checking out bits of this and pieces of that, (what a mess!), then headed inside.  We wandered through one trailer, then went out into a courtyard type arrangement.  Trailers were all around us, and Old Mike had improvised some sort of roof.  (A tarp maybe?)

Well everyone had raved about what a great time they had at Mike's, but this looked like the pits to me.  There was just a bunch of old furniture situated around a tiny TV set, all of which sat on a dirty old rug.  Hardly anyone was there.  Some old guy I didn't know told me that the best seat was on the sofa, so I sat myself down there, and tried to watch TV.

It was boring.  Boring and uncomfortable, because I had to strain to even make out what was on the TV set.  So when Keith came over, I was less on guard than normal.

Keith is ... well, Keith is a slimy jerk.  Used car salesman in training, if you know what I mean.  He's one of those guys who will slide up to you, all buddy-buddy like, and then scat, leaving you holding the bag, or talk you into doing some dangerous, unethical thing for which he will later deny all knowledge.

Keith was dressed in full disco-boy regalia.  He told me they were all going to a club called "No-Nos", and invited us to come along.  I wasn't too thrilled with the idea, as I HATE nightclubs, but it was better than sitting bored in Old Mike's pseudo-living room.

I didn't even know where No-Nos was located.  Keith said it was just off Riverside, towards town, just past the intersection with Six Forks.  Expecting the worse, my wife and I said goodbye to Old Mike, went outside, got in our car and drove off,

No-Nos was every bit as horrid as I expected.  It was kinda like Taboo, in Columbia, SC, only louder, darker, and more creepy.  We didn't stay very long!  I later learned that there are "private rooms" for couples in the back, where, (for lack of a better word), penetrations of all varieties take place.  The only rule is that each room can accommodate only two people,  (Gender is irrelevant, I suppose.)  The idea is that, after "dancing" with someone, (if you can call close quarters rubbing dancing!), you are both sufficiently hot-and-bothered to head off into a private space together, current significant other be damned!

I can envision three possible scenarios to a No-Nos visit.  (Modify gender as appropriate to match your situation.)

1. Your lady dances, is invited to a private room, gets disgusted, and leaves.

2. Your lady dances, is invited to a private room, participates briefly, realizes she is out-of-line, then gets out of there in a hurry!

3. Your lady dances, is invited to a private room, participates, and has a great time, thinking about you only later, when she needs a ride home.

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